New Name on Door in CoB - USM Forum -- Message Board

Date: Mar 7, 2005

New Name on Door in CoB

Date: Mar 7, 2005

I wonder paint and carpet colors he will request. I look forward to Johnson raising the CoB to new levels. He's my kind of go getter.

Date: Mar 7, 2005

It's there. I was told it was a temporary space, and that he'll go into the new International Center shortly after the beginning of summer semester.

Date: Mar 7, 2005

Well, if it turns out that W.J. Johnson really does exist after all, then perhaps when he gets to Hattiesburg some member of the local press can ask him to confirm or deny the conversation a poster using that name claims to have had with Roy Klumb. The comments attributed to Klumb in that supposed conversation should be of interest to faculty throughout the state, and maybe they will then be inspired to come to more visibibly to the assistance of their colleagues at USM.

By the way, why can't a courageous student journalist for The Printz ask Johnson about his alleged conversation and ask Malone about his alleged "lynching" statement? On many campuses, student journalists have lots of guts.

Date: Mar 7, 2005

quote:
Originally posted by: long island tea
"It's there. I was told it was a temporary space, and that he'll go into the new International Center shortly after the beginning of summer semester."

Yes, your information is correct. Professor Johnson will be occupying the 8,000 square foot penthouse suite atop the new Trent Lott International Development Center, quarters befitting a full professor of his stature and experience. As for his paint and carpet colors, Professor Johnson's finish-out allowance is substantial, and you may be assured that the color scheme and materials for his offices will be wurl' class.

Date: Mar 7, 2005

quote:
Originally posted by: Physical Plant Employee
"There's a new name on an office door in the CoB. This morning, a temporary nameplate was placed on the old ED suite that reads "W.J. Johnson". No sign yet of office furniture, though we are hearing that new paint and carpet will go in that suite soon. More as it develops."

I am authorized to inform you that W.J. Johnson is the real name of the former AAUP poster known to you as "Seeker," who is returning to USM as a full Professor of Economic Development. Professor Johnson received his B.B.A. from USM in 2004, and has one year of business experience as a tele-marketer based in Richmond, Virginia. Dr. Thames and Professor Malone hope that you will all stop by Professor Johnson's new office suite for a drink and a hot dog, and give him a warm welcome upon his return to Hattiesburg.

Date: Mar 7, 2005

quote:
Originally posted by: Seeker's Risk Manager
"I am authorized to inform you that W.J. Johnson is the real name of the former AAUP poster known to you as "Seeker," who is returning to USM as a full Professor of Economic Development. Professor Johnson received his B.B.A. from USM in 2004, and has one year of business experience as a tele-marketer based in Richmond, Virginia. Dr. Thames and Professor Malone hope that you will all stop by Professor Johnson's new office suite for a drink and a hot dog, and give him a warm welcome upon his return to Hattiesburg."

This is the kind of seasoned veteran of the biz world we need to elevate the CoB profile. He will bring a value-added applied research approach to a desperately over-theoretical college. I applaud SFT on such an astute hire and going "national" by culling the east coast for such a jewel. Well done, sir. Four more years, nay, don't leave this school ever. I'm hoping that in a few years that human cloning will be perfected. Perhaps we could open a lab to specialize in this technology? Lifetime contract should be extended to you and your replicas.

Date: Mar 7, 2005

did the COB faculty have any say in this appointment?

Date: Mar 7, 2005

quote:
Originally posted by: Outside Observer
"did the COB faculty have any say in this appointment?"

I am a gambling woman and my guess would be no.

Date: Mar 7, 2005

quote:
Originally posted by: Emma
"I am a gambling woman and my guess would be no."

and this person is going to teach classes???

Date: Mar 7, 2005

This is why we are not as effective as we could be.

Date: Mar 7, 2005

I agree with "here a hoax-----"

Red herrings, wild hares, etc. result in getting off task.

Date: Mar 7, 2005

What would we have said if General Blount had posted here prior to his appointment by SFT? We would have said "Hoax!"

I heard a rumor last year that SFT hired Hanbury to find a way to fire tenured faculty who opposed him. I thought it was a hoax.

I heard a rumor a couple of years ago that SFT was going to fire all the deans and reorganize the university. I thought it was a hoax.

I heard a rumor that SFT was going to put an executive MBA program on the coast and use part of the library to stage this farce of a program. I thought it was a hoax.

After so many "hoaxes" have been proven at least partially true, I am not so sure that there are any hoaxes at USM, just things that haven't come true yet.

Date: Mar 7, 2005

If Mr. Johnson is, in fact, real, perhaps he would be so kind to disclose what his salary is?

Then again, I think his writing style resembles Joseph Goebbels.

Date: Mar 7, 2005

I think the whole Johnson thing is a big hoax, but I think it's a "friendly hoax" i.e. Johnson is one of us and he's pulling out facts and arguments that need to be stated; he's keeping important issues alive. And he's having a little fun too.

Date: Mar 7, 2005

Johnson is real. He's already got his name on grant apps (small ones though).

Date: Mar 7, 2005

What does Doty think about all this? Have we heard from him on this Johnson character?

Date: Mar 8, 2005

quote:
Originally posted by: CoB staff
"Johnson is real. He's already got his name on grant apps (small ones though)."

If he's real, who is he, what's his background, and what are his credentials? Who hired him, and on what authority? Does he have a title? What are his duties? Didn't he say he'd be teaching classes? If he's the big deal he claims, shouldn't we be seeing a gushy press release from Mader's office trumpeting the new wurl' class hire?

Date: Mar 8, 2005

quote:
Originally posted by: Sickofit
"If he's real, who is he, what's his background, and what are his credentials? Who hired him, and on what authority? Does he have a title? What are his duties? Didn't he say he'd be teaching classes? If he's the big deal he claims, shouldn't we be seeing a gushy press release from Mader's office trumpeting the new wurl' class hire?"

Still coughing into his hand, "bullshi*!"

Stop feeding this worst kind of troll, don't you remember him from last summer?

Date: Mar 8, 2005

I believe HD was informed of the guy through his PUC rep. He was shocked I supposed. Most in CoB are worried about the fate of the development officer and where the Johnson cat will be located.

Date: Mar 8, 2005

quote:
Originally posted by: informant
"I believe HD was informed of the guy through his PUC rep. He was shocked I supposed. Most in CoB are worried about the fate of the development officer and where the Johnson cat will be located."

Can anyone be shocked anymore? If they closed the school tommorrow, I would not be surprised. In fact, each day I walk through an open door I am stunned. When my check still shows up in my bank account at the end of the month, I am stunned. If the server is actually up in the CoB I am stunned. I only pray my computer does not break down. Now, if they would just take care of the smelly bathrooms in the CoB.

I welcome Johnson with open arms. I look forward to making fun of him and his silly name.

Date: Mar 8, 2005

quote:
Originally posted by: Stunned that I cannot Be Stunned Any Longer
" Now, if they would just take care of the smelly bathrooms in the CoB. I welcome Johnson with open arms. I look forward to making fun of him and his silly name."

Professor Johnson is already confronting this malodorous situation. He'll be officing in the end stall of the 2nd floor men's restroom in JGH. Whether his presence there will cure, or exacerbate the problem remains to be seen, or smelled.

Date: Mar 8, 2005

quote:
Originally posted by: Plumbers Helper
"Professor Johnson is already confronting this malodorous situation. He'll be officing in the end stall of the 2nd floor men's restroom in JGH. Whether his presence there will cure, or exacerbate the problem remains to be seen, or smelled."

Hey, this is not without precedent. Former President Lyndon Johnson routinely held court while occupying his oval office loo, including many well documented meetings with cabinet officers and even some foreign dignitaries. Should be interesting when "Professor" Johnson receives guests in his office. I wonder if W.J. could be related to old Lyndon?

Date: Mar 8, 2005

quote:
Originally posted by: One Year Better Than None
"This is the kind of seasoned veteran of the biz world we need to elevate the CoB profile. He will bring a value-added applied research approach to a desperately over-theoretical college. I applaud SFT on such an astute hire and going "national" by culling the east coast for such a jewel. Well done, sir. Four more years, nay, don't leave this school ever. I'm hoping that in a few years that human cloning will be perfected. Perhaps we could open a lab to specialize in this technology? Lifetime contract should be extended to you and your replicas. "

Given today's many discussions of the mysterious Professor Johnson, this excellent post is well worth revisiting, and savoring.

Date: Mar 8, 2005

quote:
Originally posted by: Plumbers Helper
"Professor Johnson is already confronting this malodorous situation. He'll be officing in the end stall of the 2nd floor men's restroom in JGH. Whether his presence there will cure, or exacerbate the problem remains to be seen, or smelled."

Professor Johnson may not relish being the object of elitist scatalogical humor, but I surely enjoy reading about him.

Date: Mar 8, 2005

Professor Johnson's name plate just blew away in a gust of wind. Who knows where Professor Johnson will land.