While most of you think of today as Super Bowl Sunday or Mardi Gras Parade Day, the committee on sobriquet superiority is celebrating our 25th week of bringing you the Nom d’Aplomb awards.  Dr. MaderMathRevisited was kind enough to send us a card commemorating the historic event.  It read “25 weeks of Nd’A, three of which are People’s Choice, 25+3=28, 2+8=10, drop the 0 and there’s the proof that you guys are number 1 with me!”  Bless his (her?) little heart!  We celebrated with Invictus’ seafood bisque and my award winning pineapple upside down cake (maybe some of you remember that story from the summer).  Mal brought a bottle of bubbly and we toasted to you, dear readers, for giving us our raison d’etre!  So now, without further ado…

Hey Nonny Nonny, call all of your Rock Solid friends and University Stakeholders and say Let’s Get Together for this week’s PsychoBaBBle about Desperate Despots who routinely fail the Truth Test (administered randomly by Far from Gruntled faculty and staff).  This No Purchase Necessary contest is delivered indirectly to your monitored computer from the Heart of the City, so come on in and Check it out.  

Again this week, amidst the concern about the funding of higher education, there was a lot of discussion about Da plane, Da plane.  That silly little man with the ever-vigilant Kitty Hawk and Fly-on-the-wall Boy by his side thinks he’s a High Flyer now but our Secret Agent Man on the ground confirms for us that he will indeed be Up, Up and Away before much longer.  Turns out his Wing Man has become quite the liability!  Whobegone you ask?  Though lots of good people will have left too, he’ll be gone, just wait and see.  His glaring Lack of expertise will catch up with him before there is a Wholesale migration .  His Reign can ‘splain but mainly ‘bout the pain.  Meanwhile, cake is now being served in several new locations around campus by Marie Anne Thamesette.

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but not to an academic.   Brave and well-crafted words from the much Slan Dered Faculty Senate illustrate that sometimes A word is worth a thousand pictures.  We hear through Sgt. Friday that despite the president’s childish refusal to read the resolution, a meeting out By the Woodshed with an Arm Wrestler will force the president to Just Read It. There’s Lots to be learned from the past that helps to Put it in context.

The Rabbit from Wonderland was among those Hysterians and Potential Patients saying Give me Librium or give me meth after Black Friday’s College of Business faculty and staff meeting.  Shock and awe turned into something right out of Harry Potter and the Mismanagement of a University.  Evidently, the normally Ice cool dean could have Melted Butter on his forehead when he read excerpts from the provost’s My Way or the Highway letter.  Word is that even Grumpy faculty members united as Fred Friendly when that that they hold most dear was threatened.   We’ll see if Business Cents prevails.  Colleagues and friends remind the B-school (CoB, whatever!) that they will not be left to Go Greyhound down the Boulevard of Broken Dreams alone.

Excuse us while we break for this important Customer Service message from our sponsor.  Why Join USM-AAUP?  Because AAUP defends Principles that Matter, that’s why!  Brand me with an eagle claw, did I really say that?

Credentials were another hot topic this week.  Dr. Bubba, PhD is the Duty Dog who wants to know who has them.  Some say Hadden Hasn’t but that detail doesn’t appear to be terminal.  No matter whose Love Handle you are, you’ll be taken to the Cleaners by SACS if you’re Not Qualified.  Just as in Driver’s Ed, you better Watch Your Back because Walter’s Boy is on your tail.

Sports continued to take center stage but can probably be summarized by the following simple statement.  When you drop the Crystal (Basket) Ball, it becomes Shattered and it’s then very difficult to Pick up the Pieces.

Well, that’s all for this week folks.  The Elections Moderator has tallied your votes and given them to our Entertainment Chairman.  Any Late entry will be considered next week.  This 3rd weekly People’s Choice Nom d’Aplomb contest is all about Freedom of choice-for those who think like us. If you don’t like the winner, It’s not my A$$-phault, you voted.  In recognition of the increasing isolation of the dome gnome, we simply MUST award this week’s highly prestigious honor to Gnome-Man is an Island.  As always, the winner may pick up the award here.