you might be a little, redneck university if....

your central administration unit even owns (not to mention plans to use) classroom space allocation software....

the newspaper headline on your latest basketball victory reads "Big Win Over NAIA Opponent"....

The first question from the newly hired administrator charged with fixing your SACS probation problems is "So, could someone quickly brief me on what SACS accreditation 'is' and how it 'works'?".....

your most fertile ground for finding high-level administrators is Internet universities and high schools....

your President throws a neighborhood block party to announce the surprise firings of all his deans the next morning, and the ensuing scene (reaction of partygoers) resembles what Moses saw when he came down from the mountain with the 10 Commandments....

your governing Board's (IHL's) chief officer refers to your professorate as "the tenured faculty club," and then remarks that no one in his pulpwood company has tenure....

when a local sports beat newspaper columnist recognizes/writes that your President has "Stevie Wonder-like vision" when it comes to administering a university....