New Limerick thread - USM Forum -- Message Board

Date: Sep 5, 2004

New Limerick thread

Date: Sep 5, 2004

There is a USM prez called Shelby

Who does not work ethi cally

He has Lisa SLay Mader

His views she will cater

But it did not keep us in Tier Three

Date: Sep 5, 2004

Southern Miss can't be one of the gems
Of high ed -- not until Shelby Thames
Has been driven away,
And the FACULTY stay,
And THEIR vision becomes USM's.

Date: Sep 5, 2004

Economic Development's unique

That it's not has become the new leak

Like a dam ready to burst

Readers will know we're not first

Is the Trent Lott Center's future now bleak?

Date: Sep 5, 2004

There once was a program with promise

If the dome would've only been honest

They bet the store

On ED as the core

Afraid I remain Doubting Thomas

Date: Sep 5, 2004

There once was a girl named Mader

Who treated people like Darth Vader

She was to represent USM as Public Relations Director

But, instead become press secretary to a dictator

She incorporated Mader Spin and Mader Math

She misled everyone down the wrong path

Date: Sep 5, 2004

Here are the first few verses of a proposed 10,000-line work tentatively titled "The Limerickiad."

Let's lift up a lofty libation
Or have us a big celebration;
Gary Stringer's unhurt
And has washed off the dirt
And is safe now in ol' College Station!

Frank Glamser has taken the train
To a town that is really urbane;
Shelby can't get him there
(Shelby, life isn't fair)
'Cause Frank teaches now down at Tulane.

When Shelby began the commotion
He sought to impose a demotion;
By trying to fire
He stirred everyone's ire
And got these two guys a promotion!

For Shelby things always go wrong,
Yet he still sings the same dang ol' song:
"We are world-class I say,
You can trust me, hey, hey"
(Too bad U.S. News says you're wrong.)

Date: Sep 6, 2004

(Very nice, USM Sympathizer!)

There once was a professor named Polk
Who thought Shelby Thames was a joke
Noel said, “I’m a fool,
If I stay at this school.”
Now he’s freed himself from Shelby’s yoke.

Date: Sep 6, 2004

Shelby said USM is world class

Though faculty responded my a**

US News said 4th tier

the decision was clear

It is why Shelby Thames must not last

Date: Sep 7, 2004

The tier drop fiasco's been pinned

On once Golden Boy Tim. He has sinned!

All you butt-kissers had better learn

That tomorrow it might be your turn

To be left hanging out in the wind.

Date: Sep 7, 2004

Hudson screwed all of his friends,

and now his USM road ends.

He is off to Texas and will leave his ex's,

to do it all over again.

Date: Sep 7, 2004

quote:
Originally posted by: Rhyme Sublime is my Nom d'Aplomb
""

Your new moniker may be Rhyme

And you fancy your poem Sublime

But the Nom d'aplomb

Doesn't come so soon

Mal, Vic and Miss I choose the time

Date: Sep 7, 2004

Aw, shucks!

Date: Sep 7, 2004

Mal throws all the names in a bucket,
The winner's determined by luck. It
Depends on the draw,
But I think there's a law
That all limericks must contain "Nantucket."

Date: Sep 7, 2004

quote:
Originally posted by: Invictus
"Mal throws all the names in a bucket, The winner's determined by luck. It Depends on the draw, But I think there's a law That all limericks must contain "Nantucket.""

The bucket's for dewberry brandy

Miss I requires that it be handy

There's no luck involved

It's wit here resolved

Nantucket lim'ricks deemed too randy

Date: Sep 7, 2004

As we contemplate all of the spin

And mourn the situation we're in

Think of board friends we have found

That on the website abound

And rejoice in our new kind of kin

Date: Sep 7, 2004

There once was a bunch of geeks

Who lived for rumors and leaks

They couldn't raise money

To please Shelboo's honey

So now they're just worthless freaks

Date: Sep 8, 2004

I saw Noel Polk on TV

He said this place isn’t for me

As long as there’s Shelby

We all might as well be

Locked up somewhere without a key.

Noel Polk remarked I’ve had enough

of this dictatorial stuff

I’ve taken a cartful

I’m going to Starkville

And Shelby can kiss my sweet duff.

Date: Sep 8, 2004

quote:
Originally posted by: Retired prof
"I saw Noel Polk on TV He said this place isn’t for me As long as there’s Shelby We all might as well be Locked up somewhere without a key. Noel Polk remarked I’ve had enough of this dictatorial stuff I’ve taken a cartful I’m going to Starkville And Shelby can kiss my sweet duff. "

Very good, Retired prof, but not quite as good as the "Oreck" limerick done under your name on the FireShelby board. had there been a winner, yours would have won hands down.

Date: Sep 8, 2004

Thanks, Poet! I'm thrilled to be remembered.

Date: Sep 9, 2004

USM's numbers are each tabulated,
Folded and spindled, mutilated,
No heads unaccounted,
All declines are surmounted,
And where need be data's confabulated.