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USM Forum -- Message Board -> AAUP-USM MESSAGE BOARD -> Gnome Fact #7
Post Info TOPIC: Gnome Fact #7
Gnome Facts

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Gnome Fact #7
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In view of the discussions currently taking place on the thread entitled "How to tell if you are a troll," Gnome Fact #7 will be temporarily altered from the topic previously announced (which was the Gnome's Loo). The mere question posed on the other thread, "How to tell if you are a troll," suggests that many of the posters on this board have no idea what a troll looks like. Troll information, including troll identification, is liberally sprinkled among the Gnome literature. Fact #7 will be brief, but important:


The troll may be identified by (1) sight and (2) smell. VISUAL:  ". . . bracelets, rings, and necklaces on their misshapen arms, necks, and sausage-like fingers." OLFACTORY: One troll sighting described the olfactory components like this: "They danced and danced in their filthy cave until the sweat ran off their bodies and the place stank worse than usual." Trolls are fond of "crushing mice" with their "filthy fingers" and smearing them on the sides of the hole.  The literature reports a Gnome's encounter with a rat who had fled into a troll cave.  The stench was too great  even the rat. COMPUTER ANALYSES: The Gnome literature reports no reliable computer program which can identify troll postings.


And that, my friends, is a Gnome Fact!


Source of this Information:  One of the chief sources of information is Wilhelm J. Wunderlich's bulky treatsie De Hominibus Parvissimis (Concerning the Wee People) published in in 1580. That information has been included in the book by Wil Nuygen (writer) and Rien Poortvliet's (illustrator) entitled Gnomes (Harry N. Abrams, Publisher, 1977) from which most, but not all, of these Gnome Facts are taken.



 



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Gnome Facts

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quote:
Originally posted by: Gnome Facts
"The stench was too great  even the rat."
The above sentence should have read: "The stench was too great for even the rat."

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The Shadow.

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And thus the phrase, I think I smell a rat.

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Advocate

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Speaking of trolls, has anyone mentioned how SFT looks exactly like a yard elf?  You know, those ones that people steal and take on vacations with them.  Maybe someone could steal the dome's yard elf and take him on a cruise around the world! 


Funny thing is, the first time I met SFT, he shook my hand but turned his head and refused to look me in the eyes.  It could be because I'm a foot taller, who knows?  I guess he's the King of the Trolls.


 



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foot soldier

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During the previous school year there were refrigerator magnets circulating that had Shelby as just such a gnome. Also several pictures on the FireShelby site.

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LVN

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There is a list of things we cannot control: our race, our gender, our nationality, our parentage, our height and to some degree our appearance. I don't like to judge people for the things they could not control. The things they DO, however, . . .

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Advocate

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I never said there was anything wrong with looking like a yard elf.  In fact, my own grandfather looked like a cute little yard elf and I adored him!

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Gnome Facts

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quote:
Originally posted by: Advocate
"I never said there was anything wrong with looking like a yard elf.  In fact, my own grandfather looked like a cute little yard elf and I adored him!"
Don't appologize, Advocate. We do sometimes refer to specific individuals by their physical characteristics. Sometimes there's no other way to identify them. It in no way implies that use of physical characteristics is meant to be judgmental. Sometimes they are used simply as descriptive and for identification - Examples: tall, dark & handsome. The beautiful redhead standing in the corner.  Mosquito-bite whelps on the arm. Varicose veins. Tall enough to be a basketball player. Wind blown hair. If a troll has identifiable physical characteristics, no problem with using those terms to describe the troll. Fairy tales do that frequently. Example: Ponoccio's nose.

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