A colleague directed me to this delightful special April Fools edition of the Arizona Health Sciences Library newsletter, "out of Focus on AHSL"

http://www.ahsl.arizona.edu/news/newsletter/

(Hotlink, can you give a hand?)

Don't know how long this will be up, so have a look today, and dream about the exciting potential for a wurl-class Health Sciences Library at USM!

Go to the site if you can; there are some really funny pictures. Meanwhile, here are some of the high points:

Library Director's Message: Crisis Resolved!
Effective immediately the library will cancel all electronic subscriptions and return to paper copies of all journals. This will eliminate your need to invest in costly computer equipment in order to access the library! In order to insure availability to all, our volumes will be now be chained to the shelves – you’ll know where to find them! How, you ask, will this solve the problem of escalating costs for information? Now that you will have to come to the library to read our journals we can charge a small entrance fee at the door. This equitable system will mean that those who use the information will help to pay for it – what could be more fair?

Library Coffee Bar to Expand
The coffee bar, which opened in February, has turned a profit from day one, enabling the library to use the extra income to retain important journal titles that otherwise would have been cut due to budget reductions. With the subscription costs of Brain Research edging into 6 digits, Freiburger decided the time to expand into the restaurant business was now. “If we want to continue to provide high quality resources in the health sciences, we have to find alternative revenue streams to pay for them,” he says.

New E-Journal Titles
• Journal of Foot in Mouth Disease
• American Journal of Medical Mediocrity
• International Journal of Cell Phone Radiology
• Play Station Therapy
• American Journal of Ballistic Anthropology
• Arizona Seminars of the Lung and the Pancreas (AZSLAP)
• Blood, Bile and Beyond
• Physicians Clinical Golf Review
• Sensitive Care Informatics

Systems launches new faster E-Journals Interface Computer
Paul Bracke, Head of Computer Systems and Networking for AHSL, is pleased to announce the new XJ-17 Pro-Fleshe_22_AuxDucs 2000 A-33 E-Journal Interface Computer....
After some testing, the functional purpose of the Pro-Fleshe is still under consideration. Paul concludes "The coolest thing is that I get this kind of Feng Shui gut-feeling that balance has been restored to the library's electronic resources."

Familiar Faces at New Phoenix Biomedical Campus
In the spirit of the new Phoenix Campus mirroring the Tucson Campus, Translational Genomics Research Institute (TGen) will clone AHSL librarians and key personnel in what will be known on the Phoenix Campus as AHSL 2.
“Arizona is facing a severe shortage of seasoned and trained library professionals,” said Keith Joiner, dean of the UA College of Medicine. “Cloning these unsung heroes will provide a strong foundation for the new college, and fulfill our dream of focused excellence.”